The campus of IIT Bombay, owns a good collection of intelligent species: humans/ subhumans/ and non-humans. (..and for sure many more divisions among them...based on: racial/social/sexual/non-sexual/sub-sexual/sexless... ...and all controversial terms known to mankind within the limit of it's linguistic capabilities.....and I won't be writing about the controversial ones...). The incident summarized (in detail actually) here is a true version of my real experience with only delta exaggeration in order to make with the contemporary writing styles.
Beginning with a short introduction... There are hyped-sized snakes which don't bite and just rest peacefully in a corner of bathroom, cheetahs publicized like the presidential candidate of US elections, and crocodiles which are shy enough not to appear when you are taking a walk on the lake side with your GF(if there is any..). Also there are bulls which scare you like the black-hole of CERN experiment, and dogs which leave no chance of sneaking in through your open door and taking a power nap (for definition read "How to sleep less...[or, naught... and yet attend lectures without your teacher noticing your closed eyelids on last bench with his short-sighted glasses...the secret behind the success of IITians....however I myself am horrible at this sleep intelligence...or, maybe I have got only far-sighted profs.]"....you can jugaad it from IITB lan) ..on the normal messy free bed...and sometimes alongside you (ask z5D11032@iitb.ac.in for details(I won't mind if the answer contains some abusive lines for me :D).)...and taking your biscuit pack (optimism: atleast suttas are spared) while leaving...and even a shawl for his bitch...(depends on his potential).
So I was right here preparing for a long sleep and at that very moment got the sight of 'The One'...the wisest of all...lurking from the big hole in my window glass (which is otherwise used for safe disposal of waste...hygiene is important after all...even for IITians).. Because our meet was quite prosaic and I couldn't observe much..so I couldn't find out whether it was an ancient copy of my (or, maybe one of yours...because initially they looked all similar when they enlightened Africa ages ago...and in their glorious reign there weren't even the 'racial colors') ..[lim(n -> unknown)]great^n grandpa or, grandma... Anyways I would refer to 'The One' as 'he'..and no offence is intended for the feminists and the feminine.
The real shock came when he jumped all of a sudden...and grabbed the lonely banana from the table (which was left there as a proof that I got the breakfast today at the cost of last night's sleep). In a blink...I was feeling crystal clear about the human grabbing habits for the 1st time in my life....why they say.."It's all in the genes"...and thanked the wisest one for illuminating me. It also clarified my doubt about "why we prefer to jump through the open window(whenever possible) when we can just walk through the door....and jump from first floor..abandoning the stairs ??". After devouring a few chunks from the lonely thing his intelligency broke all threads of manner, when he tried to send me out of my room.....advancing towards me with a special voice...while showing his snow-whites all the time...(no-no...I won't believe if it was something else...even if it would have been.. :D) . I, in a try to cope with his unexpected anger, immediately offered him the bottle of water I had in my hand...and result...got hit with the same. Soon after.. he was analyzing the spiritual aspects of every corner of my room....and applying his foresight for a decoration scheme of his possible future hangout....ignoring my frustrated existence altogether.
It was the moment I decided to present him with the reflection of his selfishmaxx demeanor and without wasting any time showed him the way outside through the same window. After he left, I felt as brave as only Achilles might have felt...as I successfully countered the (however little) resistance shown by the most intelligent of all (non/semi/sub-humans)....and that too an IITian one(..lol..)....and saved my room.
Now...as all is over...I am planning to sue him for distorting the image of the forefathers of mankind ,breaking into my room, and destruction of property (the banana). Feel free to contact me if you feel the same way, are interested, and are either working for a Human Rights Group..or, know some policewala who will take my case in without any movements under the table..or, a judge of some renowned court anywhere, and most importantly..you will help without charging me a paisa. :(|) ;(|)
~ Vivek
Beginning with a short introduction... There are hyped-sized snakes which don't bite and just rest peacefully in a corner of bathroom, cheetahs publicized like the presidential candidate of US elections, and crocodiles which are shy enough not to appear when you are taking a walk on the lake side with your GF(if there is any..). Also there are bulls which scare you like the black-hole of CERN experiment, and dogs which leave no chance of sneaking in through your open door and taking a power nap (for definition read "How to sleep less...[or, naught... and yet attend lectures without your teacher noticing your closed eyelids on last bench with his short-sighted glasses...the secret behind the success of IITians....however I myself am horrible at this sleep intelligence...or, maybe I have got only far-sighted profs.]"....you can jugaad it from IITB lan) ..on the normal messy free bed...and sometimes alongside you (ask z5D11032@iitb.ac.in for details(I won't mind if the answer contains some abusive lines for me :D).)...and taking your biscuit pack (optimism: atleast suttas are spared) while leaving...and even a shawl for his bitch...(depends on his potential).
So I was right here preparing for a long sleep and at that very moment got the sight of 'The One'...the wisest of all...lurking from the big hole in my window glass (which is otherwise used for safe disposal of waste...hygiene is important after all...even for IITians).. Because our meet was quite prosaic and I couldn't observe much..so I couldn't find out whether it was an ancient copy of my (or, maybe one of yours...because initially they looked all similar when they enlightened Africa ages ago...and in their glorious reign there weren't even the 'racial colors') ..[lim(n -> unknown)]great^n grandpa or, grandma... Anyways I would refer to 'The One' as 'he'..and no offence is intended for the feminists and the feminine.
The real shock came when he jumped all of a sudden...and grabbed the lonely banana from the table (which was left there as a proof that I got the breakfast today at the cost of last night's sleep). In a blink...I was feeling crystal clear about the human grabbing habits for the 1st time in my life....why they say.."It's all in the genes"...and thanked the wisest one for illuminating me. It also clarified my doubt about "why we prefer to jump through the open window(whenever possible) when we can just walk through the door....and jump from first floor..abandoning the stairs ??". After devouring a few chunks from the lonely thing his intelligency broke all threads of manner, when he tried to send me out of my room.....advancing towards me with a special voice...while showing his snow-whites all the time...(no-no...I won't believe if it was something else...even if it would have been.. :D) . I, in a try to cope with his unexpected anger, immediately offered him the bottle of water I had in my hand...and result...got hit with the same. Soon after.. he was analyzing the spiritual aspects of every corner of my room....and applying his foresight for a decoration scheme of his possible future hangout....ignoring my frustrated existence altogether.
It was the moment I decided to present him with the reflection of his selfishmaxx demeanor and without wasting any time showed him the way outside through the same window. After he left, I felt as brave as only Achilles might have felt...as I successfully countered the (however little) resistance shown by the most intelligent of all (non/semi/sub-humans)....and that too an IITian one(..lol..)....and saved my room.
Now...as all is over...I am planning to sue him for distorting the image of the forefathers of mankind ,breaking into my room, and destruction of property (the banana). Feel free to contact me if you feel the same way, are interested, and are either working for a Human Rights Group..or, know some policewala who will take my case in without any movements under the table..or, a judge of some renowned court anywhere, and most importantly..you will help without charging me a paisa. :(|) ;(|)
~ Vivek
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